Some new Woids and Idears fer Ya

Paan is wonderful.

Applectomy: to enter a shop with the sole intention of purchasing apples there, thereby removing them from the premises

Arugula: something that overtakes your system, especially as you age; also, clothing marked down in price because there’s something wrong with it

Asparagasp: the sudden descent into the reality that you’ve massacred the asparagus. That’s not what you were expecting, was it?

Bananagram: the simultaneous consumption of bananas and graham crackers 

Broccolepsy: the sudden weariness that appears in young children who spy broccoli on their plate

Cabbage: the state of taxi service in any metropolitan area

Carrotosis: the skin color that results from overuse of carrots in a stir-fry

Celeriac: anyone utterly obsessed with taking celery in any form, raw, cooked, or juiced, and very, very frequently 

Chokra: what happens when you try to chew too many of ‘em at once

Kohlrabbi: what you have to do when you want your Rabbi to have Shabbat supper at your house

Lumbagel: lower back pain experienced by Jewish bakers of Eastern European heritage

Peas: victims of a mixed reputation; but when whirled, they become universally desired

Potatopathy: a mild and temporary aversion to French fries resulting from overconsumption of them

Tomatotomy: redness of the skin from taking Italian foods too frequently; can be accompanied with passionate outbursts and aggressive behavior, especially when driving

About Russ Wollman

My feet are finally in the water, and I want to keep them there.
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